MC Raven Trip Report 7

Trip Report 7

My mother’s house for 85^th birthday celebration (also Mother’s Day).

Dear Lord. I know that you’re all powerful, all seeing, all knowing and all that. And I know that you have a plan for me here and in the hereafter (I hope). Even so, I pray in all humility that you: Dear Lord please, don’t let me be struck by lightning and die with my pecker stuck in the neck of a pee bottle.

Now I’m sure most of you have spoken the same prayer at some time in the past. For me, after 3+ days of constant Severe Thunderstorms with accompanying lightning and huge amounts of rain, I figured I’d make a stab at some divine pity.

Yep, the rain’s back. It’s rained steadily for days and days. Since I didn’t want to slog through the downpour to the restrooms, I cut the top off an old Dasani bottle and used that as urinal.

Two days ago I left my coffee cup out on the picnic table overnight. In the morning I found about 1-inch of water in the bottom of the cup. Last night I did it again and, this morning I found the cup filled almost to the brim. I’ve invented a new standard of rain measurement: The Coffee Cup System of Rain Measurement. Forget about measuring inches or millimeters. From now on, use the Coffee Cup System of Rain Measurement and report your findings in fractions of a coffee cup. That will mean much more to the general public and, you’ll be able to bask in the luminous glory of an entirely new idea to mankind.